The temple..
Here is the scene..

A whole bunch of people wait patiently, looking expectantly inside to catch a glimpse .. They all have a look of anticipation, excitement.. which quickly turns into disappointment when its not their turn.

Someone tries to squeeze past trying to see if they can use their charm/brute force and wiggle their way in.

The anticipation grows as you inch your way inside. You almost go into a trance thinking about the eventual 'darshan'. No matter how many times you visit, you will always get the same feeling of sheer excitement.

And then you do get called, you are taken to your table, and you sit down and order your SPDP !! :)

Language.

Here is a 'controversial' blog. But its just what I feel.

So, language is a way to communicate. Thats it. Period. It does not matter if it is grammatically correct or not. And yet, English is the chosen language the world prefers to do business in. You don't really have a choice to not learn English. Especially if you are from one of the countries that provide services to the developed nations.

Lack of formal education in English can cause a lot of diffidence, especially when in a situation demands strong language skills. This in turn, leads to the tendency to avoid such situations.

I honestly feel that, while your mother tongue is your own language and you ought to know it, (I am pathetic when it comes to mine, and frankly, I am okay with it). I live in a city where people are super-proud of the language. And yet, I have done just fine. I can communicate, I speak that language at home all the time. I may not read the newspaper in that language, or even books, but that has not come in the way of my career or life in general. But I dread to even think how it would be, if I were not fluent in English (I do not claim to be a master here either ;), so don't go picking on my mistakes). But, I am glad, English was not an hurdle that I had to cross in my adult life...

Dwelling in the future..

I think I like to worry. If there is no real reason to worry, I cook something up.. If I am not worried, I am worried because it does not seem right..

Current worry (not really a worry, just a cause for depression) that my little baby boy is going to turn one soon.. I will never have a baby again.. The newborn smell, the tiny hands and tiny feet.. make my uterus ache..

So, although I am super excited that he is walking and talking a bit and developing a personality, I am also sad that my babies are growing up way too fast..

Observations:

First and foremost, Happy new year! Did not plan to write a somber post as the very first post of the year, but had to get it off my heart ..

Anyways, so we spent a few days at a beach resort and this place a DJ night. This was our third time at this place, and here is how things have changed.

Dec 2005 - just the two of us. Danced all night..
Dec 2007 - two of us and Avani. Danced with Avani in between dinner and water breaks
Dec 2009 - two of us with Avani and Mihir. Avani danced, while Neeraj walked around keeping Mihir entertained and I kept an eye on all the other kids while their parents were busy with the younger ones. And then I fed Mihir his khichadi while observing other no-kids couples dance all night!

So, there are a few kinds of people.
I know I dance well: They are in their comfort zone when dancing in tune and to the beat. Pleasure to watch such people and wondering why we can't dance like them

I know I don't dance well, but I don't give a damn: They are the people who don't care how they look. They love to move and shake and break into Ganpati dance every once in a while..

I think I can dance, but what will people think?: People like me, who are too conscious about how they look and so try little moves once in a while, and go back to swaying from side to side.. envying the first category

I am not gonna dance: Need to say more??

I wish I could dance: Everyone else.. they can't dance, wish they could and so they stand on the side, moving just a bit, and then stop moving in the fear that someone might have seen them. Hard to tell if they can dance, because they never find out..

The C word.

time and again, the C word pops up when least expected. Everyone knows how dreadful it can be, but to have seen it up close and personal, I can only be speechless at how helpless you really are. When C takes over, there is nothing you can do. It does not matter how rich, famous, healthy you are. It takes over...completely.

Can you believe it? At my vacation beach resort, the folks sitting at the dinner table behind me, were discussing, in detail, about P C. I think that I am developing the art of blocking out sounds and people successfully..